I
love garbage.
A
movie with a heavy flow of laughs.
Flooding
With Love For The Kid
One
man’s quest to be a one man army in an army of one.
They’re
an army of one….team.
He
gets the honour badge for Clusterfuckery.
My
attempt at writing an environmentalistic thriller.
Uwe
Bolling For Colombine
There
Can Be Only One
Soundtrack
not by Queen.
They
don’t give a fuck about your wars.
But
they will come out to play.
Groundskeepin’
it real
A
superhero movie about people who read comics, imitate them, talk about
imitating them and make their own comics about their lives imitating comics
while narrating to the audience that they are aware they are narrating to the
audience about making a comic book about trying to be like in a comic book.
An
artsy-fartsy entry in my donkeyhead subgenre.
She’s
come back from the future to rip off 80s and 90s sci-fi movies!
My
sequel to my pog movie in 3D.
Two-Lane
Blood-top Chapter Three: Valley of Death
All
the heartache and exploding cars of a Connie Francis song in comic format.
Putting
the poo back in cutsiepoo.
Street
Trash: The Director’s Cut
Before
hobos had shotguns, their bang came from within.
Sometimes
a feeling beats believing.
But
both of those trump knowing any day of the week.
Here’s
my take on the Blow-Up, Blow-Out type movie.
This
review is spoiler-free but high on life!
Father
Andreas Barracuda delivers more salvation!
When
the Port of New Orleans calls, The Cage answers!
Alexander:
The Director’s Cut But Not The Director’s Final Cut
A
gay epic observed by a hawk.
I
put on my tux and stand in line and buy a ticket at this super-exclusive movie
event of the year.
The
Traitors franchise gets a re-boot in the ass!
When
he said he’d be back, he meant three more times.
You
could cut the tension with a spoon.
Possessive
title.
Not,
John Woo is the killer.
There’s
a pale horse comin’, and Mike’s gonna ride it.
Like
The Wife Experience only courtshipier!
Flipping
the bird at crime.
A
real American (and other nations) hero(es / ines)
Off
the record, very hush-hush, and on Quentin Tarantino.
Balls
not words.
Here’s
this simple, to-the-point, barebones, minimalist, concise, lean thriller I
wrote.
No
relation to the Son of Rambow
Her
legend is better than Bagger Vance’s.
Paul
Verhoeven goes all about Eve!
James
Cameron’s sci-fi classic gets re-Indomagined!
Two Lane
Blood Top: Chapter Two: Easier Said Than Done
The
boys seek some R&R and T&A but it blows up like TNT.
A
book about going to the mall and getting more than you bargained for.
Plus
they fuck around with a flare gun.
An
adventure as big as Oleg.
The
future is a lot like the recent past.
I
waited until the break of dawn, I thought this day would never come.
This
is a children’s child movie for kiddie kids.
Further
crap from the film genre known as the thriller.
Don’t Let The
Wrong One Past The Threshold
I’m
talkin’ about that same Swedish vampire lovestory everybody else is talkin’
about.
Though
I’d rather be talkin’ about Shaft.
This
my attempt at writing a blaxploitation superhero movie.
By
request from Renee.
Resident
Evil 2: The Apocalypse
Here’s
the real bloody Valentine.
I
don’t have much to say except this film receives my highest possible honour.
Jonathan
Demme’s 1974 tale of penal woe.
Here’s
a film that is a very lucky #7!
Musician of the Year
2008: Lady Gaga
This
chick is unbelievable.
Here’s
this Jet Li vehicle I wrote up.
Try
to count the reasons it would never get made.
There’s
something to be said about this type of hero
and
I say it (in the living years).
Casino
Royale 2: The Quantum of Solace
The
camerawork is shaken, not stirred.
My ode to this exploitation epic.
Two Lane
Blood Top: Chapter 1: Blood Crush
My
biker vigilante epic gets rolling.
These
streets are savage and from 1984, although they are not streets of fire.
Here’s
my attempt at a youth-oriented urban drama film.
Highlander
2: Renegade Version
This
one’s a doosey.
all this shit is copyrighted, motherfuckers.